I likes me some…

There is this perfume that I have wanted for a very long time. I got a free sample once when I ordered something mundane like soap – or was it lotion? – from Sephora. I haven’t bought myself any because it just feels like a luxury I can do without. But someday…

I don’t normally go for large bag/purses, but as any mother knows, they are sometimes necessary. I’ve been eying this one in particular. I think that something that went across my body, leaving my hands free, would be a great thing to have when I take all of the kids to the park in the summer. That way I can lug diapers, wipes, tissues, sunscreens, cell phone, etc…and not have to keep pulling my bag up on my shoulder while wrestling with a small child.

I’m not sure what the “innovative ratchet system” is on this paper towel holder, but I want one. The description says it “allows you to tear off a sheet using one hand, without the roll unravelling” and, by golly, that’s exactly what I want. I’m tired of my plastic paper towel holder and the half a dozen paper towels it rolls off while I try and just get one sheet with my clean hand. I end up having to put my messy hand – usually covered in yogurt that the baby half ate, half wore – on the paper towel roll and leaving a mess on the top of the roll. It never fails.

I once had a cloisonne ring that was blue and beautiful. Alas, I seem to have lost it. I’ve been searching everywhere for another one, but have yet to find exactly what I’m looking for. I don’t remember where I bought the ring at. I thought maybe in Russia, but it also could have been in Germany. Or heck, it could have been in England for all I know. I wish I could show you what it looked like, but the closest things I have found are these bracelets. Now just imagine them in ring form, and much prettier. That’s what my blue ring looked like. If you find one in a size 6, let me know. Thanks. I think that if I were to ever have so much money that I didn’t know what to do with it, I would start collecting Russian and Chinese cloisonne. There are some breathtakingly beautiful things. Also, there’s these. (Which, by the way, scares me to no end.)

Speaking of things that I would buy if I had money to spare, this is high on my list. Or maybe I can talk Starbucks into setting up a shop here in my house, just for me. The odds of me having either are about the same.

I love these shoes. I want one in every color, except for maybe the black and white stripe. Oh, and these! Aren’t they cute? And these, too, please. I’ve had several different pairs of their original black shoes throughout my life, and while I sometimes feel like I’m a little too much like a suburban soccer mom to wear these things anymore, I still heart Vans. I big pink puffy heart them. And that’s a lot of love.

This is the point where any males might want to stop reading for fear of getting too much information. But, girls, I feel like I need to share this with you. You see, I’ve been struggling with finding the proper attire to cover my, um… sizeable rear. Because my rear is sizeable, I have been trying to find something that, when viewed from the back, does not draw attention to it’s size. And the regular old underwear I have just gave me visible panty lines and drew unwanted attention to my rear. And while the answer to that problem is to wear thongs, those just aren’t that comfortable. And to be honest with you, they made me feel very unsupported; I felt very much like I wasn’t wearing anything. So I decided to try a boyshort at the suggestion of a friend. And let me tell you, you should try them too. But do not expect them to look half as cute on you as they look on the models. (Unless, of course, you are built like those models.) I was very surprised at how very un-cute they looked on me. Like granny panties, only bigger, but they do sit lower on your hips. They are not little scraps of fabric, but in fact are more sizeable than any other underwear I have owned. But they cover without riding up, and there are no lines drawing attention to my backside. Enough said.

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